Записи пользователя: greg_house_ru (список заголовков)

November 19, 2014

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Chase: She hasn’t had sex.

House: Why are you so sure?

Chase: She told me she’d never kissed a boy.

House: You read her diary too?

Chase: She asked me to kiss her.

House: I rest my case. A regular nine year old girl does not have sex on the brain, not when a doctor is threading a catheter through her vein.

Chase: But she’s not a regular nine year old. She’s got terminal cancer.

House: Cancer doesn’t make you special. Molestation on the other hand…

Chase: She wanted one kiss before she dies. If she’s never kissed a boy it’s a fair bet she’s never had sex.

House: Tell that to all the hookers who won’t kiss me on the mouth. Hey, here’s a theory, she has been molested, seeks refuge in romantic fantasies with older men with great hair. And I think you left out the punch line, victims of molestation learn to work the angles. Manipulate people. You did it didn’t you. You kissed her.

Chase: It wasn’t sick. [Foreman and Cameron freak out quietly] It was one kiss for a dying girl. One small… one small kiss before she dies. Thank you. Thanks.

House: This is exactly why you can’t touch my markers. Go see if she’s had sex.

Autopsy, S2

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November 18, 2014

House: Hi, this is Greg House. Again. Third message, hopefully indicating how much I want you to call me back. I'd say that your son is dying to increase the urgency, but you probably already know that. (he ends the call) The fake people who care that Wilson stays alive didn't work, so I need the real people who care about him to tell him what an idiot he's being.

Adams: Where are we going?

House: I just got paged to go to the bathroom. I don't know where the rest of you are going.

Adams: Some of our patient's symptoms might be physiological, and some might be psychological.

Taub: You think being forced to bury painful memories is making symptoms worse?

[House pockets his phone and takes out his Vicodin bottle]

Park: Grief avoidance can lead to all sorts of anxiety disorders, which can manifest into physical illness.

[They stop walking just long enough for House to take a Vicodin tablet]

House: (pocketing the pill bottle and continuing down the hall) Let's assume… that all his symptoms are real symptoms.

Adams: we're going to avoid grief avoidance?

Taub: Studies after September 11th showed that repression was actually better for coping than dwelling in misery. What about polycythemia vera?

Adams: RBCs are slightly elevated, but not that much.

Taub: Hodgkin's lymphoma?

Park: Would have showed up in the PET scan.

[They stop in front of a mensroom door. House leans against the wall facing the bathroom. He pulls his cellphone out of his pocket]

Adams: What if your guy got hurt at practice? And, like everything else, just didn't tell anyone. Could have set off DIC, would explain everything.

Taub: (motioning toward the bathroom) I thought you had to go to the bathroom.

House: I didn't say I had to go in.

[The door of the bathroom opens and a janitor rushes out and down the hall]

Janitor: Need some more mops in here!

Holding On, S8

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November 17, 2014

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Cuddy: You didn’t tell anyone else what I’m doing?

House: Not a soul.

Cuddy: Wilson? Cameron, maybe you mentioned it to her?

House: No, I’m a really good secret keeper. I never told anyone that Wilson wets his bed.

Cuddy: Part of the protocol for in vitro fertilization is twice-daily injections of menotropins. I can’t do it myself.

House: Turn around.

Cuddy: No clever comments about bending over?

House: Not unless you want me to.

Cuddy: I’m just not used to House the professional. [House is transfixed by Cuddy’s behind.]

House: I was just thinking about what your mother looked like, because your father obviously chose her for breeding purposes –

Cuddy: Shut up.

House: Natural selection sucks. We pick our mates based on breast size, cars they drive…. They did autopsies on married couples and found correlations in pancreas size. We’re hardwired to pick for stupid reasons, you have the chance to pick for smart reasons.

Cuddy: I think the Germans had a similar theory about 60 years ago.

House: I’m not advocating wiping out entire races, I’m just saying you don’t want to mate with the first plastic cup that buys you a drink. [All this time, he’s wiping a patch with a alcohol swab.]

Cuddy: I’m pretty sure you’ve got that.

House: Microbes can be sneaky.

Cuddy: Ow! Thanks.

House: Twice a day. This is going to be fun.

Who's Your Daddy, S2

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Here's my [H]ouseMD 10th anniversary video

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November 16, 2014


On this date, House, MD premiered.

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House premiered ten years ago on November 16, 2004. Here is a puzzle to commemorate that.

House Pilot

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November 15, 2014

[House and Wilson settle on the sofa. House opens the bag of chips.]

Wilson: Even if I had changed my diet, what possible reason could I have for hiding it from you?

[House, for the second time in history, offers Wilson some chips. Wilson gestures “no.” House shoves chips in his mouth.]

S5 Saviors

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November 14, 2014

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Cameron: Thanks for getting my back. I thought you seminary boys were against the death penalty.

Chase: I left the seminary.

Cameron: Over their stance on capital punishment?

Chase: I’m against the death penalty in principle. In practice, however, watching a murderer die causes me a lot less grief than annoying my boss.

Acceptance, S2.

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November 13, 2014

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November 12, 2014

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November 11, 2014

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Фанатам доктора Кадди

Сериал "Инструкция по разводу для женщин"


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November 10, 2014

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November 9, 2014

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November 8, 2014

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November 7, 2014

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November 6, 2014

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November 5, 2014

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November 4, 2014

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Доктор Грегори Хауз